Undulge

What, the mission isn’t enough for you? So picky. Fine. Undulge is an app that will be available on Android and iOS. We’re also creating a web app for millennials and anyone else who is slowly but surely crumbling to dust. When you indulge, you open the app, hit the corresponding button, and $1 is donated to a charity to help you Undulge. Let’s walk through an example.

You danced to a Chris Brown song, and now you can’t stop thinking about how he's a known abuser. You open the app, hit the “Listened to Chris Brown” button, and $1 is donated in your name to a charity that supports victims of domestic violence.

Undulge is a nonprofit operated by a 501(c)(3).

Do you want there to be? Would you be willing to link your credit card or let us scrape your bank account? Did you have something else in mind for automation? Let us know on Twitter, Bluesky, or send an email to UndulgeApp@gmail.com.

We’re being very deliberate about the causes we support. Plus, ceding any control over what qualifies as an indulgence would totally ruin our power trip. However, we are open to suggestions - see the “How can I give feedback” question below. For this specific type of feedback, include the words “New Indulgence” so we can automatically sort it out from all the brutal roasts we’ll be receiving from the unenlightened. A good suggestion has an example of the indulgence and a suggestion for an offsetting charity.

Nope! Well, probably not. But let us know why you think we’re wrong and we’ll take it under advisement.

Because you won’t. The whole point of this is that the indulgences you are Undulging are minor and frequent. You’re not going to do the research to figure out the right charity to donate to, you’re not going to vet that charity to make sure it operates in a way you agree with, you’re not going to set up accounts at ten different charities…you get the picture. We’re making this easy for you. You’re welcome.

Nope. We don’t take any salary right now; if we start to, it’ll be because this side project has blown up beyond our wildest dreams and requires more attention than we can give to it without quitting our jobs. That will take AT LEAST two weeks. If it does happen, though, we’ll be totally open about it, and publish the salaries along with all our other financial data.

We’re going to publish this on our website in excruciating detail as soon as we have all the numbers nailed down. We’re getting all sorts of exceptions on fees from payment processors, but it’s all in flight. What we can tell you is that the goal is to cover our operating expenses and not go bankrupt. We ultimately expect to keep a fixed percentage of each donation for that purpose, which will also be published on our website. We’re big on transparency.

No, we wanted a peppermint shake from Chick-fil-A and felt guilty about it, and came up with an idea for an app that lets you donate to offsetting charities. Then we realized that The Good Place had eloquently laid the foundation for the fundamental issue we were addressing, and we shamelessly ripped THAT directly from them. What we’re trying to say is that we’re on the same level as Michael Schur, creatively speaking.

Tweet at us on Twitter (we know the name changed, we just refuse to acknowledge it) or Blue at us on Bluesky. We’re @UndulgeApp on both. Or you can email us at UndulgeApp@gmail.com.

Who who, who who. You really want to know? We are your nameless, faceless morality overlords. Nice to meet you.

I mean, we started the charity. Seems only fair. If you don’t like it then…I guess just pout.

Nothing gets by you. Do you see how great the name Undulge is? It’s important to us that you consider us clever.

Absolutely not; none of the religions would have us. We’ve considered starting a cult, but who has the time.

That’s Phil, our mascot. His full name is Phil Anthropy. He’s a capitalist pig. Get it?

This app isn’t for you, bruv. Just move along.